What Is It About Fisting That Some Gay Men Are Attracted To?

The Fister is actually doing two important things physically to the Fistee.

He’s one expanding the exterior and interior sphincter muscles, forcing them to relax and then contract again around his wrist and perhaps arm. Stay with us, don’t faint. It’s more frightening to actually see it in slow motion on a video. The sensation is one of being opened and filled. Which requires a lot of relaxation, lube and trust. Don't just let someone you met that night fist you. And make sure they remove rings and watches and their nails are clipped...
So you take a hand and push it into an orifice that’s generally smaller than a hand and that’s fisting. And most people are like “yuck,” even though fisting isn’t that much objectively weirder than regular, garden-variety sex. But the mechanics and implied violence turn people off, and so fisting has a stigma.

But for many, the stigma is unwarranted and fisting is a joy. So, for the sake of fostering honest and stigma-free conversations around sex in all its variously human forms, we spoke to a few people who enjoy it. Both giving, as well as receiving. They spoke about how they discovered fisting, how it feels, and why it’s their thing. And some names have been changed because they don't want their friends and family know.

J O H N , 28, Designer

This is the first time that I’ve been asked about fisting without being bought a drink (laughing). Okay, so personally I like to receive, and I definitely wouldn’t stick my hand in a butthole. Actually, I tried that once but it wasn’t my thing. I’m a bottom. I am very bottom. In fact, I don't think I’ve ever known someone who likes both. Generally, people do one position and one position only. Fisting basically feels like having an extremely big dick inside your ass. First, you think that it won't fit, but once it’s in there, you feel like the luckiest person in the world. Can I give you a piece of advice? Try it at least once and then tell me how boring your sexual life was before that.

I’ve never counted, but I think I’ve been fisted more than 20 times. And each time was with a different guy because I’ve always blocked them after sex. They all came from hookup apps, like Hornet or Grindr. I don’t think I’d ask a boyfriend or someone I know to fist me because they’d think I’m too kinky. Also, fisting is something I only do when I’m high. I love coke. Not just in my nose, but also inside my ass, because it makes the experience of being fisted so much more comfortable. So I usually meet guys in hookup apps, we do drugs, then I clean my asshole, and we fuck. One time I forgot to douche myself properly. I’d drank a lot that night, and I wasn’t okay, but I asked this freak guy from Hornet to come over and fist fuck me. Now I want you to picture a scene from the movie American Beauty, the one with the blond actress lying on a bed of red roses. And now substitute all those flowers for shit. That’s what happened. And I really wish that guy could forgive me for that awful experience and I hope to never see him again. 

A D A M , 25, Male Escort

I’ve never been fisted—I don't work as a bottom—but I’ve certainly done some fisting. Most clients normally just want plain good sex, but the ones who want to be fisted usually have a very specific kind of fetish. And I’d say how often I get asked for fisting depends on the local gay culture and community. I think I'd be requested to fist people more if I lived in Europe, for example. And I've never been asked by a woman. I think it's a guy thing. In my experience, it’s the guys who want to take their sex game to another level. I don't think fisting required any kind of special preparation. I just try to be slow and careful so I don’t break anything. The main thing is you need lube. Lots of lube. And enjoy it. Sometimes I start playing with my fingers inside the person's butthole and that makes me hard. And some people can only take it to the wrist. Some will take it mid-arm, others take it all the way up to my elbow. I'm not the one who decides. But you’d be surprised how big a rectal cavity is. You can put an arm in there just fine without harming other organs.

 

The last time I was fisted was in December. I just remember looking at a Christmas tree while my ex-boyfriend fisted me, and then I fisted him. Both ways can easily make me cum, but I prefer being fisted. It’s a unique feeling. But I hate that my partner has to wear gloves because they’re uncomfortable. I’m on PrEP now, so I never use condoms in a regular fuck, but I have to use them when I’m fisting.

Fisting has its benefits. Like taking a poo afterwards—it’s fluid, it’s liberating, it’s lovely! But I tell you this because for the first time you’ll be terrified of pooping during the action. But then after sex, it’s liberating to take a dump knowing you didn’t poo anywhere you weren't supposed to.
I think the craziest thing that ever happened to me was a guy asking if he could stick his phone inside my ass. He was planning on filming my insides, like a sex tape. And I was curious and horny so I said, “Okay, let’s do it, but be careful.” So, we tried it but it came out too dark. Maybe the camera on his phone wasn’t good enough to produce some good ass art.

I’ve tried talking openly about fisting a couple of times, but it’s like bringing up veganism at a barbecue—every time you mention veganism someone rolls their eyes. That’s how I felt talking about fisting, so I gave up. I would love to more open about it though. I believe that the more we talk, the more we can demystify this, as well as a kink in general.

Do you have your hot fisting stories? Share with us at info@maylwear.com